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Coping with the Holidays After Loss

For many people, the holidays are about spending time with loved ones. But for those who have suffered a recent loss, the holidays can be painful and isolating.

Here are some ways you can cope with the holidays after a loss:

Recognize You are Not Alone

It’s easy to feel as though you are the only one experiencing great pain during the holiday season. Everywhere you turn, people seem to be happy, putting up decorations, buying gifts and making holiday plans. It’s important to recognize the truth right now, and that is that you are not alone. There are people all over the world who have experienced loss, some perhaps very recently.

Honor Your Pain

No one expects you to feel joyful and in the holiday mood right now, so don’t feel as though you must pretend for others’ sake. It is very important that you honor whatever emotions you may be experiencing, whether it’s sadness, anger, regret or a combination.

Take Your Time

The holidays are usually a busy time for people. There is much to accomplish and many events to host and/or attend. You do not have to keep your normal schedule this year. You simply will not have the mental or emotional stamina for it. So take the time you need. If you don’t feel like attending many (or any) events this year, that is fine. People will understand.

Help Others in Need

One of the worst parts about losing a loved one is the feeling that we no longer have any control over our lives. Loss makes us feel helpless. One way to fight this feeling is to help others who are in need. As a bonus, connecting with others who are hurting can often be a salve on our hearts as well.

When Don’t These Guidelines Apply?

If you have children, it’s important to understand that they are looking to you right now to know what life will be like from now on. To a child, the loss of a parent or sibling can frighten them terribly. Though you may not at all feel like celebrating the holidays, doing so helps your child know that life does go on and that there is space in your life to feel joy along with sadness.

 

If you have experienced loss and would like to explore grief counseling, please be in touch. You don’t have to suffer alone.

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Can Long-Term Isolation Lead to an Addiction?

We are living through some of the most stressful times in recent history. With the global pandemic raging on, many of us are still worried about our own health and the health of our loved ones, especially our older friends and family members.

Many of us have also been hit with financial burdens. Some have lost jobs and others have had to close their businesses. How will the mortgage and bills get paid?

To make an already bad situation worse, a lot of us are still experiencing lockdown and quarantine. Many are working from home for the first time and still, others are unable to travel and be with loved ones.

This has left a majority of people feeling alone and isolated when they are already feeling they are most vulnerable.

The Link between Isolation and Drug Use

During stressful circumstances, it is a natural tendency for people to turn to drugs and alcohol as a way of coping. A study reported in the American Journal of Epidemiology found there was a 25% increase in alcohol consumption in the weeks following 9/11.

The stress and isolation of the current pandemic are putting those people who are prone to addiction at great risk. Virtual cocktail hours are now officially a thing. But how many of those cocktail hours end when the computer is shut off?

Human beings are social creatures. When you take our ability to be social away, it can lead to depression and anxiety. Even people who have no history of addiction are at risk of developing a drinking or drug problem during the pandemic as a way of coping with social isolation.

When coping with stress, it can be hard to self-monitor our behaviors, but it is incredibly important for our overall health and well-being. If you suspect you have been drinking or using any drug more than you should at this time, it’s important to be honest about that.

Ask yourself a few questions:

  • Has cocktail hour started earlier or gone later than usual lately?
  • Does the bottle of wine that used to last 3 days barely last one night?
  • Do you ever feel like you SHOULD cut down on your drinking or other drug use?
  • Have you noticed you’re thinking about drinking or using drugs more and more?
  • Have loved ones commented on the amount you’ve been drinking?

It’s important that you are honest with yourself at this time. And if you answered yes to one or more of these questions, it’s important that you get some help.

Many treatment centers remain open during this time. You may also want to think about speaking with a mental health counselor. If in-person sessions are not available, find a provider who offers telehealth solutions. This means you can receive treatment online.

Times are tough for everyone right now. You are not alone. If you are turning to drugs and alcohol to deal with the stress and isolation, please get the help you need.

 

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Drug Abuse in Men: Reasons, Signs, and Treatment

While both men and women suffer from drug addiction, the reality is that men tend to suffer at a rate much higher than women. The result is in this country, we are seeing an epidemic of men with drug addictions.

Why are the Numbers So High?

To really understand the impact of addiction on men, it’s important to look at the statistics. Data put out by the Substance Abuse And Mental Health Administration reported that roughly 67% of all substance abuse admissions in the United States are male. It should also be noted that these numbers hold up, regardless of age, sexual preference, or ethnic group.

But why are these numbers so disproportionately high? One explanation might be that men naturally partake in riskier behaviors. Men tend to be the ones that drive fast, scale buildings, and experiment with illicit drugs.

Men also will turn to drugs to self-medicate their depression and anxiety. While men and women both suffer from depression and anxiety, men don’t typically seek help from a counselor. There is a sense in many men to reach out for help is an act of weakness. And so they go it alone, using alcohol and other drugs to soothe their pain.

Signs of Drug Addiction

Now that we understand a bit more about why drug addiction is a bigger issue for men, let’s take a look at some of the most common signs:

  • Drinking or using drugs on a daily basis.
  • Drinking or using drugs alone.
  • Hiding their drug use.
  • One or more DUI.
  • Sudden problems at work or with friend/family relationships.
  • Spending time with new people who seem to be a bad influence.
  • Sudden weight loss or gain.
  • Losing interest in hobbies and other activities.

If someone you love is showing one or more of these signs, it may be time to intervene and speak to them about a treatment plan.

Treatment for Drug Addiction

Rehabilitation for drug addiction is a complex thing. Our loved one will not only have to detox his body to remove every trace of the drug; he’ll also have to commit to therapy to understand the psychological and behavioral reasons behind the drug addiction.

Therapy can be done one-on-one or in a group setting. And of course, he will need to join a support group such as AA to make sure he stays on track.

If you or a loved one are struggling with drug addiction and would like to explore treatment options, please be in touch with me. My goal is to help you navigate the healing process so you can live a happy and fulfilling life.

 

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The Effects of Alcohol on Your Body

We’ve all read the studies that tell us having a glass or two of wine a day is actually beneficial to our health. But what happens when that glass or two turns into three, four or more?

Drinking too much alcohol can have serious ramifications on our health. Here are just some of the ways alcohol negatively affects your body and overall health:

Liver Damage and Toxic Buildup

Your liver is responsible for breaking down and removing harmful substances from your body, including alcohol. When we drink too much alcohol, over time, it can damage our liver leading to a condition called cirrhosis. Once your liver becomes this damaged, it can no longer remove harmful toxins from your body and you can experience another type of health crisis.

Type 2 Diabetes

Drinking too much can also damage your pancreas where insulin is made. When the pancreas is no longer functioning optimally and it cannot make enough insulin, your blood sugar levels begin to rise. This can eventually lead to the development of type 2 diabetes.

Damage to Your Central Nervous System

You know that when you drink too much, you begin to slur your speech. This is because alcohol impacts your central nervous system. Alcohol essentially reduces proper communication between your brain and your body. This is why you have slurred speech and horrible coordination when you’re drunk. Drinking in excess can eventually cause numbness and tingling sensations in your hands and feet. It can also cause you to lose memories because damage occurs to your frontal lobe.

Poor Digestion

The more you drink, the more you damage the lining of your digestive tract, so you soon become unable to absorb important nutrients from your food. Many alcoholics are suffering from malnutrition.

Drinking in excess also causes ulcers, and sometimes these ulcers can begin to bleed, causing more serious health complications.

Risk of Heart Disease

Chronic drinkers have a higher risk of developing heart disease and high blood pressure. If left untreated, they also have a higher chance of having a stroke or heart attack.

 

Alcohol in moderation can be very beneficial to your health. But drinking too much affects your health in a negative way. If you think you may have a drinking problem, please get help.

 

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